The Journal :: Cast of Characters


Me -- terminally cute and perky when I'm not being a ranting bitch. The cheerful demeanor usually breaks down when I'm driving in Dallas traffic (otherwise known as the ninth level of Hell) and I start swearing like Eddie Murphy in "Harlem Nights." You'd never think it to look at me, would you?

Lyndon (aka the Bodacious Brit) -- my husband, my first-line tech support and the man who rubs me after my workouts. Also a brilliant photographer and beloved of our cats, and when his blood sugar drops below a certain point he develops a loony sense of humor that usually has me widdling myself.

Patrick (aka the Nathan Lane of Mid-Central Illinois) -- my best friend for, gosh, 23 years now. Patrick is an established player in the dinner theater scene around Bloomington/Normal/Peoria, Illinois, and is available for weddings, bar/bat mitzvahs, and any production of "Forever Plaid" he can get his hands on.

Stacy (aka "MOOOOOOOOOM!") -- my sister, and the one who got all the verbal wit in the family. Short, funnier than hell, has three kids, lives in Illinois where she makes fun of the other suburbanites. I don't see her nearly often enough.

Steve (aka the Man from McKinney) -- my most excellent friend, fellow fen and general partner in crime. I used to carpool with him to work, and damn, the man could drive. Of course, my nails were usually left in his upholstery, but still. . .

Mike (aka "Hollywood") -- my favorite turquoise-eyed nephew, nose tackle and all-around cool relative. Even if he did manage to do bizarre things to his iBook (such as breaking the power supply by tripping over it). Lyndon says that he can never be allowed to breed with Tina -- the result would be the technological Antichrist.

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