Monday,
December 31, 2007
NEW YEAR'S EVE

NYE, With Cats

(Melanie, JJ and Jordan are on the couch watching the Big D: NYE show on TV)

JJ: Oi.

Melanie: What?

JJ: I want some more of the coconut gelato you're eating.

Melanie: Please?

JJ: What?

Melanie: Please? It's what humans say when they want something.

JJ: So? I'm a cat.

Melanie: Hm -- you have a point.

(Melanie feeds JJ a droplet of gelato on her fingertip)

Jordan: CAN HAVE GELATO?

Melanie: Okay, okay.

Jordan: YAY!

(Melanie feeds Jordan a droplet of gelato on her fingertip)

JJ: So what are all those servants doing on TV?

Melanie: First off, they're humans, not servants.

JJ: Servants, humans, whatever -- you all look alike to me.

Melanie: Do you want any more of this gelato?

JJ: (grudgingly) I'm listening.

Melanie: Okay, all of those people are downtown so that they can celebrate New Year's Eve.

JJ: What's that?

JORDAN: I LIKE GELATO! KTHANXBAI!

Melanie: New Year's Eve is the last day of the year.

JJ: Hmmph. Sounds like a stupid reason to celebrate. Besides, shouldn't they be home with their cats?

Melanie: I don't think they all have cats.

JJ: What? Why the hell not?

Melanie: The deponent knoweth not. Anyway, today is the last day of 2007, and tomorrow will be the first day of 2008.

JJ: 2008 what?

Melanie: The year 2008.

Jordan: 2008! YAY!

JJ: Oh, you lie like a rug. This is Year 6.

Melanie: I beg your pardon?

JJ: (sighs) It's quite simple. I only remember six years, so this is Year 6, QED.

Melanie: You really think the universe revolves around you, don't you?

JJ: (in his best Jack Sparrow imitation) Um, cat?

Jordan: CAN HAVE MORE GELATO?

Melanie: Oh, all right.

(On TV, the clock counts down to midnight. Fireworks go off.)

Melanie: Happy new year, you fabulous furbag.

JJ: Right back at you, Mom. By the way, that gelato would go great with some tuna.

Jordan: FIREWORKS! YAY! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Happy new year, y'all.

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