Sunday,
March 24, 2002

Quilt Therapy

I think I owe you some explanation of the gaping holes in this month's entries. I've been running full tilt both during the week and on weekends for the last five weeks -- work has been hectic as all hell, and then the weekends I've either been on business trips, doing cons, or (last week) dealing with a big, energetic dog that followed me everywhere.

What exactly have I been dealing with? Well, two tools that I'm working on are going into external beta, and we're desperately trying to make sure that everything gets set up properly for the customers that will be beta participants. I've also been informed as of Thursday that, much as I feared, I'm the new trainer for these tools. Problem is, I'm not a trainer -- I'm a technical writer because that's the best way I communicate. Put me in front of a class and expect me to teach, and it's gonna be a bloody nightmare.

In the meantime, I'm trying to document another tool, but every time I opened the file some emergency would crop up on the first two and I'd have to go fight fires, and the owners of the third tool are getting understandably grumpy about the lack of documentation. So all this is at work. I also have a one hour commute one way, which turns my general work day into 11 hours or so. By the time I get home, I'm exhausted and the last thing I want to do is sit in front of my computer some more and write. But that's what I'm supposed to do, because I'm a writer. I haven't written anything yet this year -- my writing group is starting to get fidgety, and the leader twitted me that it would be nice to see something from me in the queue again. Hell, *I'D* like to write something again.

My home life is somewhat fraught because Lyndon's first reaction to this sort of thing is to cuddle me, and he gets hurt when I try to explain that I don't WANT to be cuddled, I just want to be left alone to destress, and when he does hang around me it makes matters worse. Lyndon's also not happy with his job, and he wants to talk about that with me, which I understand completely but is the LAST thing I need right now. On the family front, I've been sending my sister money to help support my brother while he tries to pull his life back together. I can afford the extra cash, and he is doing well, but I still worry about him.

Basically, things came to a head Friday, in conjunction with one of the most massive cases of PMS I have ever experienced. I was supposed to go down to Aggiecon in the afternoon, but I was late getting into work because I was trying to get my CD burner to talk to my computer (it will, but doesn't appear on the list of devices and Adaptec Toast refuses to burn anything to it), then I was late getting out of work, then realized my TollTag was reading yellow and I really needed to stop off and get it put on my credit card, THEN realized I also needed to mail my nephew's birthday present. I had already missed my 3:00 PM reading, and was most likely going to miss my 8:00 PM panel.

That's when I had my mini nervous breakdown in line. I finished up at the TollTag store, went to the post office and mailed off Mikey's present, then went home, told my poor, long-suffering husband not to come anywhere near me, and went straight to bed for four hours. It was a short nap, timewise, but it was exactly what I needed at that moment.

So this weekend has been a quiet one -- I've been trying to stay away from everyone so that I don't go ballistic on them, which means I've spent most of the last two days hiding out at the Dallas Quilt Celebration 2002. Congratulate me -- I'm now a member of the Dallas Quilting Guild. I also picked up fabric for a coworker's baby quilt, this absolutely delicious candy-colored batik that is going to make a spectacular block and sashing quilt with contrasting appliqués.

Oh, never mind -- I'll post pictures when it's finished, and you'll understand what I mean. It's just turning out to be one of those months.