Meanderings: January 18, 2000

Tuesday,
January 18, 2000

The Moving Finger has struck. Apparently my Christmas gift to my nephews has had something of an effect on the youngest one, who is mildly autistic and really loves memorizing lines from movies. It looks like he has a brand new line in his repertoire -- but will he ever figure out the appropriate digit? (Admiration, commiseration and offers of similar stories can be sent to stomasek@flash.net).

Dear Mel:

Thank you for sending Mikey and Tony The Matrix. It's become Tony's favorite movie (you know how he is with them). I'm really quite glad that he is into The Matrix because it's more age appropriate than Winnie the Pooh, you know? As we speak, we are now watching the 6 o'clock showing of The Matrix.

Anyhoo, you know how Tony takes lines from movies and applies them to real life in situations that warrant it? I'm certain you remember the scene where the agents have Neo in the interrogation room, and he gives them the finger.

Yeah, you can guess what's coming.

So, last Saturday morning at about nine, Tony still has morning breath and I tell him to go upstairs and brush. Now, we all have the flu, we're feeling crabby and out of sorts, and he has to argue with me under the best of conditions, so I'm practically shoving him up the stairs to go and brush.

"No!!! WANT TO WATCH THE MATRIX!"

No, Ton, I tell him. It's too early, and I don't want to watch The Matrix.

"Want to watch Pokemon!!!!"

Okay, but you have to brush your teeth first.

"Pokemon -- no brush teeth!!!"

And round and round we go for about 10 minutes until I finally march his butt up the stairs to the bathroom. We get in there and I say to him, "Now BRUSH!"

The little runt turns to me, and in his coolest voice says, "How about if I give you the finger. . .[flips his finger up]. . .and you give me my POKEMON!"

I look down at his little digit. He's flipping me the pinky.

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

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